It’s Not About the Workout—It’s About the Why

I’m currently in the tapering phase of marathon training. You’d think this part would be easier, less mileage, more rest, but it’s also when everything catches up with you: the fatigue, the self-doubt, the question of “why am I doing this again?”

Here’s the thing: yes, completing a marathon is a goal in itself. But the deeper work, the stuff that actually matters, happens long before you toe the starting line. It’s in the 5 a.m. alarms, the runs you don’t want to do, the routes you’ve memorized by heart. It’s in the quiet victories, not the medal.

And while I haven’t enjoyed every run over the past few weeks , I’ve never lost sight of my “why.”

My why?
I love being outside.
I love getting to know my city (or a new city) in different seasons, different light, different moods.
I love the me-time—just me, my running shoes, and a podcast or audiobook that no one interrupts.
I love my running friends and the kind of conversations that only happen when you’re moving side by side.
And yes, I love stepping away from the responsibility of taking care of a small human (who I love deeply, of course)—because it’s exhausting, and this is my way of breathing.

This is what keeps me coming back.
Not a number. Not a body goal. Not a perfect training log.
It’s the why.

We’ve Been Taught to Move for the Wrong Reasons

From a young age, many of us learned that exercise is about controlling our bodies. Shrinking them. Fixing them. Punishing them after “eating too much.”

We’re bombarded with workouts that promise flatter bellies, tighter arms, or a pre-baby body. We’re sold plans with rigid rules and aesthetic goals. It’s no wonder movement starts to feel like a chore—or a test we constantly fail.

And here’s what gets lost in that narrative: movement is a form of self-expression. Of care. Of connection. Of power.

Why the Why Changes Everything

When you pause to reflect on why you move, you unlock a whole new relationship with your body.

Your why might be:

To feel strong carrying your groceries—or your toddler.
To unwind after a chaotic workday.
To reconnect with yourself when the world feels loud.
To protect your bone density or keep your joints mobile as you age.
To play, to laugh, to be in your body instead of judging it.

And here’s the beauty: your why can change with your season of life. What matters is that it’s yours.

Even If You Know Your Why—Say It Out Loud

The other day, a dear friend sent me a paper and said, “It reminded me of you.” One of the biggest compliments I’ve received. The paper talked about the deeper reasons women move and how our motivation matters so much more than the metrics.

It reminded me of something important: even when you know your why, it’s just as important to communicate it. To say it out loud. To share it with the people around you. Because if we want our movement to be supported—by our partners, our families, our coaches, our colleagues—we have to help them understand why it matters to us.

And this part is especially real for mothers.

I’ve heard it more than once:
“No wonder you bounced back so easily after pregnancy—you’ve always been so active.”
Yes, I’ve been active. But not because I was chasing a bounce-back. I kept moving because I knew my why.

Back then, it was about easing some of the aches from my extra weight, getting fresh air during nap windows, regulating my emotions during postpartum fog, and remembering that my body was still mine, even when it was also feeding and holding and carrying someone else. My why looks a little different now—but it still comes back to this:

I love being outside. I want to show my son that movement can be fun. That it’s where you learn resilience, joy, and self-trust.

That’s what I hope he sees. Not someone trying to “get her body back.”
But someone showing up—for herself and for him—with intention.

Movement Anchored in Meaning is More Sustainable

Research supports this: people who are driven by intrinsic motivation—like joy, stress relief, or a sense of purpose—are more likely to stick with exercise long-term than those motivated by appearance goals alone.

When your movement is rooted in how you want to feel, not how you want to look, you give yourself the permission to pivot. To rest. To dance one day, walk the next, and skip the gym without guilt because you’re listening to your body, not punishing it.

How to Reconnect with Your Why

If you’re stuck in an all-or-nothing mindset, or if movement feels more like a to-do list than a lifeline, try these questions:

You don’t need a fitness tracker to answer those. You just need a moment of honesty.

A New Way Forward—Rooted in Your Why

This isn’t about giving up on goals. I still love training for events. I love seeing progress and chasing big dreams. But even in structured training, I return to my why—because that’s what carries me through the hard days, the skipped runs, and the imperfect efforts.

So whether you’re preparing for a marathon, walking with a stroller, or dancing in your living room between work calls—pause and ask yourself: Why am I moving? What am I really chasing?

Take a moment today to write it down.
Not your fitness goal. Not your step count.
Your real, heart-centered reason for moving.

When you lead with your why, the pressure shifts. The all-or-nothing mindset softens. You build a relationship with your body based on curiosity, not criticism. And that? That’s where the magic happens.

And if you feel like sharing, I’d love to hear it. Message me or tag me—let’s create a space where women move for themselves, not for the mirror.

Because when we move from a place of love—not lack—we change everything.